Just when I think things are coming under control a bit God laughs in my face. Hysterically, for ten days. Apparently God finds pneumonia funny. I, do not. I am an absolutely disgusting human being. It is rare (as in never) that I actually take a sick day. And I took my second one this year last week. My body hurt so bad from coughing I was confident I was going to end up breaking a rib. Fortunately God thought that would be too much. But I couldn't walk up the stairs. I couldn't sleep. I saw the doctor twice in three days and it wasn't until they gave me the option of chilling out at home with some potent cough syrup or chilling out in the hospital with bad TV that I actually listened, went to bed and sat on my ass for four days. With a litany of medication. Nebulizers, inhalers, cough pills, augmentin, steroids, hydrocodone, codeine, advil...I didn't even know it was possible to take all of this at one time. The albuterol and steroids jack me up and make me cert...

Once upon a time I wrote this post:  A few weeks ago, I came home from a business trip and walked in my front door only to be overcome with an urgent need to vomit. Our house smelled like dead fish, or, the scallops Scott had made for dinner. My food aversions have passed, but I'm still not the biggest fan of seafood, especially as a signature scent. I'm incredibly sensitive about smells in my home, and on top of that my olfactory system is frighteningly keen. Even when I'm not pregnant. So I paraded around with air freshener, choking the shit out of my husband, dog, plants and ultimately myself. But at least it was with clean linen. Here we are,  several  weeks later, and I swear I can still smell it. It certainly cannot still be the scallops. I look for it constantly...is it the garbage, the sink, Scott's shoes? Dead animals in the walls? I'm currently convinced that there are thousands of cockroaches decomposing in our walls from our regular exterminatio...

Milestones. Something that used to pertain primarily to project plans. Now, something that pertains to the development of my children. Some are physical, some are behavioral, and all of them serve to set expectations for something that is never the same for any child. I haven't forced my children into any of their milestones. Despite being (unnecessarily) worried at times, I've let it all occur naturally - sometimes with encouragement, other times not at all. Except with bottles, because I had to wash them. We were done with that shit at 24 months and 1 day. So it shouldn't come as a surprise that my 4-year-old still has a pacifier. My pediatrician who I adore (I might wear lipstick to doctor's appointments) told me "no kid goes to Kindergarten with a pacifier in their mouth".  He said the same about potty training, so I let it go and low and behold the kid did it on his own at 3 1/2 and we never looked back. This guy might know what he's talking about...

I've spent a week practicing work-life. That is, work and life intertwined with no clear lines of delineation. It all just runs, and if you're lucky, works together. I spent Tuesday morning at the park with my kids, and the afternoon on conference calls. Yesterday I did (much needed) lady maintenance in the afternoon and spent the evening writing a proposal and devising staffing plans. And today, I worked first thing, took a trip to the grocery store, worked some more, and now I'm going to take a nap. As soon as I stop writing. And, surprise, it's been an awesome week. I gave myself the ok to decline meetings to which I wasn't essential, and I felt no guilt about taking some time for me when I could have been spending it with my kids. I was super productive at work AND home, and I'm a much happier non-conflicted human being for it. Dare I say I felt...balanced? I know not every week can be like this - I only worked from home, I had no travel, and the kids ...