Calling it Like it Is

I shut down at 5pm sharp today to get my nails did--was looking like my thumbs were my last meal (and they were).

For 1 1/2 hours I was the center of attention. But being who I am, I of course felt guilty about it so I was overly nice, as usual, to Kim (my FAVE manicurist) and the newbie doing my toes. Also got my man brows waxed. I was fully relaxed, enjoying my treatment.

Half way through my pampering, two girls (will not call them women) of the sort that make me proud I was born in New Jersey and have retained some of my roots walked in. Once she screamed at the "just enough to get me by English" speaking owner "do you have BALLERINA SLIPPERS" (not deaf!) I immediately called judgement. And I of course was right.

If you live in Atlanta, you might know what I'm talking about (hell, you might be one). They exaggerate all their words with "lazy language", smile at you and spit in your hair when you turn around, and say "bless your heart" when they really mean "f&ck you kindly".  And they are typically dumb. Seriously. But they hold good jobs because they went to UGA and so did the Director.

I continued to enjoy my leg massage having pleasant conversation with Kim, while they treated the spa workers as their personal slaves. The civil war is over (and P.S. we won).  Honey, when your idiot husband loses his job at the bank, you too may be cutting someone else's toe nails. And I pray to God mine. At least be cleaning my house.

You ain't so special, redneck on vacation.


  1. come on now... is this where you want to be when Jesus comes back???

  2. Yes, is it where they want to be is the question.


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